Men are complex, aren't they ladies? They say that we're the confusing ones, but when you get down to it, men are much more frustrating to try to understand. They hide their emotions and act all "manly" about everything. It is extremely difficult to understand why a man does what he does or what he wants, especially when he will never say to you "this is what I want". Well, ladies, what is it that men want in a relationship? Let's dig deep into a man's psyche in order to discover what his hidden desires truly are.
1) Wife in the Kitchen, Girlfriend in the Bedroom
One of my male friends has a saying once that a man wanted a wife in the kitchen and a girlfriend in the bedroom.
After I got over the sexism of the remark, I stopped for a moment to try to understand what he was saying. Even though it sounds as though a man just wants a woman to feed him and have sex with him, it's much deeper than that. Let's break that phrase down a bit.
What does it mean to want a "wife in the kitchen"? The first reaction many women would give is that a man wants his wife to cook and clean for him all the time. If you look a little deeper into the phrase, though, it really means that a man wants a partner. He wants someone who can work with him; someone who is willing to help him, not do things for him. A man wouldn't mind a home cooked meal every once in awhile, and neither would a woman, but that really has nothing to do with the phrase.
How about the "girlfriend in the bedroom" part of the phrase? It's like an old mob movie I saw once where the main character said, "I have a girlfriend and a wife, because my girlfriend will do things that my wife won't!" That doesn't mean that a woman in a sexual relationship has to do things that she's uncomfortable with, but, rather, a man is just looking for a woman to be open and loving in their relationship.
2) Emotional Commitment
Getting married is a big step, and even though a man may not be ready to take that step, they may still want a commitment from their lover. This commitment isn't one that's written on a piece of paper or that's spoken with a religious person present. This kind of commitment is an emotional one.
A man wants his lover to trust him and to love him. He wants her to stay faithful to him, and to respect the boundaries of the relationship that they both agree on.
For some women, making an emotional commitment is actually more difficult than many believe it would be. It's hard to trust in someone fully and completely; much more difficult than signing a piece of paper or speaking words in front of a priest.
This, however, is what a man truly wants. They want to know that they can trust in a woman, and they want to be able to be trusted as well. Strangely enough, more women have to work on trust issues than men do!
3) Making a Man Happy
What does it take to make a man happy in a relationship?
Contrary to what most women are led to believe, it doesn't take much. Most men can be happy with much less than it takes for a woman to be happy. All they require is compassion, understanding, love, and someone to be with.
Can men be frustrating and annoying? Of course! That's the right of every human being. But men, even though they try to hide behind a tough façade, are not as strong as they let on.
Men are very fragile, especially when it comes to their lover. They can be protective and may get jealous easily, but instead of being insulted by this, it should be something that you feel proud of. Be happy that your man finds you attractive enough that he's worried another guy will try to steal you away.
Even if you're not technically married, if you are living together and have uttered those three all-important words (and by those I mean "let's be exclusive", or something along those lines), than he thinks that you're his.
Don't think of it as being property, think of it as being loved, wanted, and desired by a man who is too fragile to explain exactly how much you mean to him for fear of rejection.
Men don't want much from a relationship: just unconditional love.
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By C. Pemo
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